Somewhere, the line between physical and mental exhaustion gets very blurry. Today might be that line for me. My physical pain comes and goes, but as it does, my mind gets hazy. I tend to sleep or forget things I did or should be doing. In an effort of transparency, there will be days where nothing seems right. Momma said there’d be days like this. (Wonder how flat that reference is gonna fall).

For what it’s worth, this is still doing wonders for today’s sanity check. A reality check in itself and an affirmation that I am indeed a human with the struggles I find myself dwelling on within these posts. For the day, I made very little progress on what I wanted to do. A little progress is good, better than nothing but the hollow I feel echos throughout.

I will have good days, bad days, “regular” days, and worse days. I would tend to call this a regular day. If you are still on this ride with me, it is appreciated. Call this my speaking to the void. No response is needed, but maybe just maybe there’s another lost soul in this maze just needing to know they are not alone. Being this is a normal day for me, bear with my current ramblings.

Normal thoughts of mine in this sort of day are:

• Did I do enough??
• What didn’t I do?
• I guess I could have done more
• But could I have really?
• Why aren’t I better at being what I could be?
• Let me try tomorrow

I might not have done enough today, and I admit that. But I did do something. So, it’s +1 small victory. I did not do a few other things, so it’s net 0. The next two cancel out. I could indeed have done more; but then I would not have the strength tomorrow. I can freely say I am not better at being “what I could be,” and right now, that’s OK. I need focus, passion, assistance, and patience to grow and develop into what I need to be. I’ll call today a “+.5” with that revelation.

Peer into my list. There might be some overlapping ideas with your own. My body is hurting, and my mind is too. But I will be trying again tomorrow. This I promise myself, and you; the listening void. If only in this echo chamber, let me hear the promise. Try. Again. Tomorrow.

Human, sane(?), living, and hopeful; I will continue to navigate the maze of reality and darkness and find my acorns. Does anyone out there have some bread crumbs for a trail to follow out? Hopefully, we don’t need snacks on the way, I forgot to pack them, and that bread might be tasty.

Thanks as always for getting this far.

-LostAcorns

Quick update for those returning to the nest: the book list is in progress. I am organizing my shelves and will make it a pinned page when it’s ready. Contemplating adding more types of those ideas should there be any interest.